Day 274 – “Who’s In, Who’s Out” – Choosing your Bridal Party

Bonjour from Project Wedding HQ

Since we have been engaged we have been discussing how many to have in our Bridal Party.  Chris knows how many attendants he wants, I have just being a little unsure.  I want to make sure I make the right choice and I don’t want the bridal party to be huge.

So choices choices.   As I am a more mature bride with a small circle of friends, many of them in the industry, the choice of a bridal party has been made a little bit more difficult for me.  As this is my second marriage I have learnt from my previous wedding that this selection is very important.  With my previous selection I had a lot of problems with one particular attendant, amplifying all of the stress that I already had with her being quite a diva leading up to the wedding, sometimes making it near impossible.  Also pretty much after the wedding we never ever heard from the groomsmen ever again.  Silly mistake and I don’t want this to happen again.  So I do believe we have narrowed it down to our Maid of Honour, Bridesmaid, Junior Bridesmaid, Bestman, Groomsmen and Pageboy, an intimate Bridal Party.  If you are having difficulties making a decision here are some tips for you.

TODAY’S TIP:  Selecting your Bridal Party

• Write a wishlist of your attendants.
• Consider family politics.
• Think of their responsibilities, how will they cope with these.
• Evaluate your needs and expectations of these attendants.
• How many will you talk to in the not so distant future.

Hopefully these tips will assist you in narrowing down your most obvious choices. Remember once you ask someone to be an attendant you can’t go back.

Until next time.

Au Revoir, The Savvy Bride

Day 276 – Wedding “Bills” – Who’s Paying!

Bonjour from Project Wedding HQ

So with a wedding date, venue, guest list, what comes next. Some times this topic can come first, but who pays for what. In the case of my wedding, Chris and I are paying for everything.

In decades past it was tradition that the Brides parents pay for everything, but not anymore, far from the case. I would say a very small percentage of weddings I have taken part in that it has being solely the brides parents that have paid for the wedding.

I have found the most common options today are that the couple pay for everything or it is now split up between the brides parents,  grooms parents and the bridal couple will take on the remainder.

This is certainly a very sensitive topic and needs to be approached with due care  At the end of the day you can not make someone pay for something they don’t want to and you will never ever make everyone happy. Lesson learnt previously.  Discussions about money always causes disagreements whether it be for a wedding or not, but especially a wedding as it is such an expensive event.  If people won’t contribute and that means you have to pay for something else, so be it.   Don’t give yourself undue stress by having confrontations about who is paying for what, if it is easier for you to walk away from it, do it.  You will have many other things to worry about.  This just means you have more control over your wedding because you are paying for it.  I know this seems easy for me to say, but I have experienced this to many times taking part in many weddings and it really causes strain on family relationships and with the bridal couple.  It is just not worth it.

This is the way Chris and I see it.  We are paying for it all and we will have the wedding we want with no one else’s input. Until next time.

Au Revoir, The Savvy Bride

Day 277 – “Am I Invited” – The Guest List

Bonjour from Project Wedding HQ

Like most bridal couples family politics and finances play a huge role in determining who receives an invite to your wedding, unless you have unlimited funds.

Chris and I are very lucky in respect to he does not have a lot of family, however on the flip side I am Italian and that is the complete opposite, I know the world.  For me I have had to consider family, friends and my colleagues in the Wedding Industry on my side of the guest list.  This has become really difficult as we have already completed our non negotiable guest list, but I am just trying to trim back where I can due to finances.

However only recently I was placed in the predicament when a someone I know said to me “Oh you will have to let me know when the wedding is so I can place it in my diary”.  Oucchhhhh, did I feel so bad, I was not inviting this person due to number restrictions and many other issues.  So now what do I do, this person is expecting an invitation to my wedding and I know there will be others that will expect one as well.

This is where as a Bridal Couple we will need to tread lightly so as not to hurt anyone’s feelings.  Here are some things you may want to consider if you are having diffiuclties in selecting who to go on your guest list that I found very useful:

• Does this guest know your engaged.
• Have they met your fiance.
• When did you last speak.
• How often do you see them.
• Would you be offended if you weren’t invited to their wedding.
• Will they be a part of your lives forever.

Until next time.

Au Revoir, The Savvy Bride